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  • Writer's pictureMelissa de Jong

Why would I get all introspective?

The darkest saddest place to be in can come from not having awareness of your self. Not knowing the shadowy parts of your self will have you confused about the world around you, the reactions of the people in your life will have you slipping into victimhood, but you can’t see how you could have played any part of why the people around you behave in such a distasteful way. You loose control over your response-ability.


Some people want to stay on the surface of life, where they think things can’t hurt them. They question the need to be introspective and bring up any feelings of discomfort. "I can just float up her and have every thing just bounce off of me, and blame other people for the misfortune I have been dealt with in life." Simple.


But the truth is, that is a false safety, it is a slow poison. Un-recognised emotions such as shame and guilt live in your body and they grow, and spread, and start to consume everything in its pathway, like a metastatic cancer. Guilt and shame creates separation from you and the rest of the world, and it turns in to judgement and unforgiving black and white thinking.


Living on the surface, not coming face to face with your shadow will eventually completely unground you. You will end up not understanding who you are. The version of you, a long time ago, when things were less complicated, will eventually slip away, and you won’t even recognise the person you have become. This is where mental health issues begin.

So are you really safe not looking in-ward? Not looking at why you behave the way you do? What happened in your life? What program or belief system is navigating your reactions? Although this process can seem uncomfortable, with the right support, and a genuine curiosity and desire to improve the relationships around you, and with yourself, you will be saving yourself from future breakdowns. Identity crisis, and toxic family relationships become the bullet you avoided.


Because the truth is, we all have FREE CHOICE. It can be uncomfortable, but the choice is always always yours. We are incredibly empowered beings with a tremendous amount of control in our lives. Humans are fiercely capable, you are capable! The perspectives we have, the way we react, are in our control. The more tangible decisions like where we live, where we work, and who our friends are, are all in our control. We can make choices that are more aligned with who we are IF we meet our shadow selfs.


If you want a life that feels aligned, like all the happy visions you had for yourself are pretty damn close to reality, then you have to get introspective with yourself!

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